DONE!

This is it! I've reached the end of the road, more or less, in my treatment. 20 out of 20 radiation treatments DONE. I'm so relieved. I'm tired of the strange shooting pains, the burning feeling both inside and on my skin, and the fatigue, which also caused me some forgetfulness and fogginess at times. The fatigue was the worst, honestly and came in waves that would just suddenly hit me. I've never felt fatigue like that. Working out helped a lot so I was glad to have that outlet. 

It's going to be really strange not going to Texas Oncology every single afternoon for my treatment. I won't see Connie, who was Deaf and had the appointment just before mine at 1:20, or Mrs. Smith who was 97 years old and in the 1:40 time slot (I was the 1:30). It's strange to think about them still there. Yesterday after the radiation techs all cheered and showered me with confetti (there's no bell) I wished the other patients well before I left. (I told the radiation techs that, no offense, but I hoped I never saw them again unless it was at HEB.)

I met with my medical oncologist last week and she said, "are you ready for cruise control?" So that's basically what's next. It's still part of my life, but I can take my foot off the gas for now and just ride without it being a big disruption of my life. Yes, I'm relieved and yes I'm happy to be done, but I also feel like life has changed and I need to find a new normal. Now I go on the meds that will hopefully keep this from happening again.

Starting Monday I will begin Zolodex injections. I'll go into Texas Oncology and have an implant injected that will release to suppress my ovaries from making estrogen. I get a new injection every four weeks. My cancer was HR+ (the cancer cells were positive for hormone-receptors, meaning the cells receive signals from either estrogen or progesterone to continue growing). We'll be combining this with tamoxifen which blocks the effects of estrogen on hormone receptor-positive breast cancer cells by sitting in the estrogen receptors on the cells. If tamoxifen is in the receptor, estrogen can’t attach to the cancer cell and the cell doesn’t receive estrogen’s signals to grow and multiply. So basically this is a two-pronged attack to stop this from happening in the future.

I'm trying to process everything that's happened. I am the same person I was in December and yet not the same person. It's been easier than I anticipated and also harder than I thought it would be at times. Clearly there's a lot to process and I definitely need to keep working through everything that has happened to me. Onward!